I woke up already tired.

Not the kind of tired that sleep fixes, but the kind that settles into your bones when you spend too much time thinking about how to exist correctly.

The house was quiet in the early morning, the way it always was before they woke. I liked this hour. It was the only time the walls didn't feel like they were watching me. The only time I could move without calculating every step.

I stood in front of the mirror longer than usual.

Not because I wanted to look pretty. That wasn't the point. I adjusted my clothes carefully, smoothing imaginary creases, changing them once, then twice, then a third time. I wanted to look... right. Neutral. Acceptable. Like someone who wouldn't attract attention for the wrong reasons.

I told myself today would be different.

Today, I would do everything perfectly.

I would anticipate instead of react. I would be helpful without being intrusive. I would show—quietly—that I could exist in their space without causing friction.

That thought alone made my chest tighten.

When I went downstairs, the house was beginning to stir. I heard footsteps, low voices. The smell of coffee drifted faintly through the air. They were awake.

I hesitated at the bottom of the stairs, heart pounding.

This was it.

I entered the living room carefully. Alessandro and Matteo were already there, standing near the windows, talking in low voices. Enzo sat nearby, scrolling through something on his phone. Xendro and Santino were nowhere in sight yet, which made my stomach twist with both relief and dread.

I didn't know where to place myself.

Sitting felt wrong. Standing felt intrusive. Leaving felt like failure.

So I stayed where I was, hands clasped lightly in front of me.

"I can—" I started, then stopped.

All three of them looked at me.

The silence stretched.

My heart began to race. I had already messed up. I could feel it. I rushed to fill the gap, words spilling out faster than I meant them to.

"I mean—I just wanted to ask if there's anything you need today. Or if I should—if there's something I can do."

The moment the words left my mouth, I knew.

This was wrong.

Alessandro's expression didn't change, but something in the air shifted. Matteo's eyes narrowed just slightly—not in anger, but in assessment. Enzo looked at me with quiet surprise.

I wished I could pull the words back into my mouth.

Matteo spoke first. His voice was calm, but it carried weight.
"Why?"

The question hit harder than it should have.

I swallowed. "I just thought—since everyone's busy—I could help. In some way."

There it was.

Trying.

Too much.

Xendro's voice cut in from behind me. "Wow," he said lightly. "Look at that. She's volunteering now."

Santino laughed as he joined him. "That's new. You bored, Bella?"

My face burned. I hadn't heard them come in. I hated that they always caught me off guard, always saw me at my weakest.

"I didn't mean—" I started, panic creeping into my voice. "I just—"

Alessandro turned slightly, finally fully acknowledging me. His gaze was steady, unreadable.

"You don't need to do anything," he said.

It wasn't cruel.

It wasn't kind either.

It was final.

The words landed like a quiet dismissal, and my chest tightened painfully. I nodded quickly, too quickly, afraid that if I didn't agree fast enough, it would become worse.

"Of course," I said. "I understand."

Matteo watched me for a moment longer than necessary. His voice softened just enough to sting.
"Don't try to insert yourself where you're not needed."

That was it.

That was the moment everything collapsed inside me.

I felt foolish. Exposed. Like I had reached for something fragile and dropped it in front of everyone. I had wanted approval so badly that I had crossed an invisible line I didn't even know existed.

Xendro smirked. "Guess that answers that."

Santino shrugged. "At least she tried, right?"

I couldn't breathe properly anymore.

"I'll go," I whispered.

No one stopped me.

I turned and left the room, my steps fast but controlled, refusing to let them see how badly my hands were shaking. I didn't stop until I reached my room and closed the door behind me.

Only then did I break.

I slid down against the door, pulling my knees to my chest, pressing my forehead into them. My heart was pounding, my throat tight, tears burning behind my eyes.

I had tried.

I had really tried.

And it had only made things worse.

Why did I keep doing this to myself? Why did I keep hoping that if I just did a little more, tried a little harder, they would finally see me as something other than an afterthought?

I replayed the scene over and over in my head. Every word. Every look. Every pause.

I should have stayed quiet.

I should have stayed invisible.

That was the rule. That had always been the rule.

Approval, I realized, wasn't something I could earn by effort. Trying made it worse. Trying made me noticeable. And being noticeable was dangerous.

I wiped my eyes angrily, frustrated with myself.

I didn't want to be dramatic. I didn't want to be weak. I just wanted to exist without feeling like I was constantly on the verge of doing something wrong.

But wanting too much—that was my flaw.

I lay back on the floor, staring at the ceiling, feeling hollow.

From downstairs, I could hear their voices again, moving on, continuing their lives as if nothing had happened.

And I understood something then, painfully clearly.

Trying too hard didn't bring me closer to them.

It only reminded me how far away I already was.

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how was the chapter?

right now i am focusing on her emotions of how she feel's like inside her own house and her dynamics in the house from next chapter's u will see more interactions of her with each brother and there role's in her life!

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